July 28, 2012 by AJ Briones
It has been quite some time since I was able to ride the LRT Purple line. I happened to secure a good seat since there was not that much of a big volume of passengers. After a few minutes after I was able to sit comfortably, before the train door was able to close down, a young female college student entered the train. I guess she was a 1st or 2nd year in a university in Manila. As soon as I saw the young lady, knowing that there were no seats available for her, I stood up and gave her cues to sit down on my seat instead. She just looked at the seat and only stood there holding on to the bar designed for standing passengers. She didn’t even bother to tell me that it was okay and she would rather stand. It was an obvious seat and kind of offending on my part but it made me think deeper.
Here are some of my ideas and concerns about the matter:
1. Women or Young Women, let men be gentlemen. If they offer you a seat accept it. One big reason why there are so many men who are not gentlemen is because a lot of men got used to the culture that women think that they don’t care if men would be gentlemen. Yes, women and men are equal and can handle themselves but please accepting kind gestures are really important in molding a culture where men are automatically gentlemen.
2. Women, please never demand for men to be gentlemen or even claim that you should make an effort to teach men to be gentlemen by setting up situations that they should be gentlemen. Don’t even tell them to do things because it’s the right thing to do. It isn’t your job to teach men to be gentlemen. Older men have that responsibility or if you want someone who is of female gender, a guy’s older female relative. That’s the closest it can get in my opinion. Women, if men won’t be gentlemen, just let them be that way. Forgive us because a lot of times we don’t know what we are doing. One day we’ll learn our lesson.
3. Here’s the reality, a lot of men are not gentlemen; and that forced or in some sort of way ushered women to correct a number of men by teaching them to be gentlemen. I know a few people who do that and I do not condemn that behaviour. I applaud it but heavily discourage it. The person who should be teaching men to be gentlemen are other men. Real men. Mga kalalakihan, hindi ba kayo nahihiya na ang nagtuturo sa susunod na henerasyon ng kalalakihan magpakalalaki ay ang mga kababaihan? Sampal sa kalalakihan yun! Do your part and do your role to teach the next generation of men to be gentlemen. We are the ones who should be responsible of doing so.
One question is, how will we do it? How will guys start teaching the younger generation of men to be gentlemen? Here’s an idea, be a gentleman yourself. Live as an example not to show off but because you desire to be a man who is sensitive to the opposite sex. This is not an effort to tell women that they are weaker than the men but an effort to make very woman feel important, protected and respected.